Talk, Talk, Talk

It has been over eight years since I stood up in front of our church and took our wedding vows. Eight years is a pretty long time, but I still remember so much about my wedding day. I can still remember the panic of my sister being half an hour late to pick me up for my hair appointment and the relief of finding her wandering around my apartment complex desperately calling out my name because she didn't know my apartment number (this was before we all had cell phones). I remember the excitement of getting dressed with my bridesmaids and standing with my Dad as we waited to walk down the aisle. I remember the shock and hilarity of seeing my Auntie Bev and Pastor Strand dancing to 'I wanna rock and roll all night' in the middle of the dance floor. I will never forget pacing the floor of our hotel room after the reception waiting to hear word if my Dad and Mother-in-Law were able to recover my backpack, which had my identification in it, from the closed up church, so I would be able to go on our honeymoon early the next morning. I remember the news of Princess Diana being in a fatal car accident. What I don't remember well is our wedding ceremony.

I remember walking down the aisle and my Dad handing me off to Dan, but after that it all becomes a blur. I think the pressure of remembering what to do in front of all our friends and family made me forget most of the ceremony. But one of the parts that I do remember was part of Reverend Strand's message to us. He told us that three of the most important things in a marriage is to 1. Talk, 2. Talk and 3. Talk. He said that studies have shown that married couples talk less and less each year and some end up talking only 20 minutes a day. Since being married I have realized how important communicating and talking really is. And since having kids I have realized how hard talking and communication can be.

Being a mother of two small children I have three opportunities for uninterrupted time during a typical day; before the boys wake up, while the boys are napping and after the boys have gone to bed at night. Trying to get even the simplest thing done while the boys are around can sometimes be near impossible and downright frustrating. I often find myself being bombarded with requests, questions and things to do. Trying to carry on a conversation with kids around is quite laughable. Poor Dan has to suffer through me asking him the same question three times because I either forgot I asked him the question or I was too distracted and didn't hear his answer. Dan and I have learned to wait until the boys are in bed before attempting any serious conversation, but it can be quite hard to limit conversations to certain times.

But now that the boys are getting older and playing with each other (and not constantly at odds) Dan and I are finding more time to engage in uninterrupted conversation. Tonight we actually had a continual conversation throughout our entire dinner, with only minor interruptions from the boys. Although last week as Dan and I enjoyed some time together talking while the boys played upstairs, we found a half naked Daniel staring at a pile of toilet paper and wipes he had put in the toilet in an attempt to get his bottom clean and Sammy standing on the bathroom counter with his hands in the Vaseline jar from the medicine cabinet.

I still haven't decided if the clean up was worth the half hour of uninterrupted conversation with my husband, but I do know that the more you talk and communicate the better off you are.

The Games People Play

Recently I read a blog over at defective yeti about games that he recommends for playing with your children. I read it mainly while day dreaming about the day that I could play board games with the boys. It is probably one of those unrealistic parental fantasies that we would all sit around happily playing board games and enjoying each others company. Well, be careful what you dream for...
Tonight before we had dinner we four were sitting in the family room fooling around. The Old Maid deck of cards was laying around from a few days previous when we had played it with Maracela, our seven year old neighbor. Suzy or I, I can't remember who, asked if anyone wanted to play it, and Daniel jumped right in. Parental Fantasy engaged! Daniel was on Suzy's side, and Sammy was on my side. Daniel would pick a card from my deck and Sammy from Suzy's. Somehow, we aren't quite sure how, Daniel knew that picking the Old Maid was bad news. Well, you can see where this is going. He picked the Old Maid card and the reaction was instantaneous. Shrieks of anguish, desperate attempts at shoving that card right back at me, to the point that he ended up prone on our floor wailing. Those of you who have observed my parenting skills (or lack thereof) know that I usually take a pretty hard line with this type of behavior, but in this instance all Suzy and I could do was laugh. A lot. Thankfully Daniel didn't notice since you couldn't hear much over his shrieking. After five minutes or so of wailing/writhing on the ground Daniel finally recovered his dignity. Suzy and I had finished the game by this point and were getting ready to play again. Half heartedly we asked if anyone wanted to join us, and Daniel said yes. Can you see where this is going? Yes it wasn't long before he picked it again! With a somewhat quivering lip Daniel calmly placed the Old Maid in my hand (he was on my side for this game) and said, "And I didn't cry this time." Way to go buddy. We are proud of you.

Feels like Summer

As I sit here and type I am wearing shorts and a short sleeve shirt. Why am I attired in such clothing in the middle of February? Because it is 82 degrees outside right now! For the past couple of days we have been having a Santa Ana. While it makes for chilly nights it also makes for warm dry days. Normally Santa Anas come in the summer and are not so welcome, but when they come in winter a Santa Ana is a treat. It is a little glimpse of what is to come.

Even my plants think it is summer. I have sweet ripe strawberries hanging from their pots, blueberries blossoming and forming fruit and even one of my tomato plants I just planted sent out some flowers. Just like the plants I am tempted to pull out my sun dresses and tank tops and bask in the sun, but I know that the hot weather will probably not last and soon the cooler temperatures will settle back in. But for now I will soak up the heat of the sun and dream of the warm days to come. Swimming anyone?

Whoever heard of strawberries and blueberries in the winter?
The word 'dormant' is a foreign word to my plants.

Sammy enjoying the warm weather and wearing my sunglasses.